Work, stress and… new beginnings

I just can’t believe how quickly time goes by, just the other day I was typing a happy 2009 message and here we are already into almost the 3rd week into a new year. P and I decided that we would need to get back on track with a Fertility Clinic, as the last bit of 2008; I focussed on sorting out my body with acupuncture. I have to say that the acupuncture really helped me to distress, and somewhat sorted out my cycles. I think that the acupuncture just didn’t give me the results that I so desperately needed in 2008, and for some reason I feel overly eager this year. Maybe it’s because I really didn’t have any disappointments yet, or maybe it’s because I really feel the need to expand my family, or maybe it’s just the little clock inside me that ticks away, but for what ever reason it is, the main reason is I WANT TO! P and I had a deep conversation the other night regarding the fact that we always try to please everyone else except for the one who is closes to us… we always try to make everyone else’s’ life easier, but forget that we also have a life, which we need to focus on, we also have the urge to grow our family and above it all we also need to focus on one another. The pas year we always tried to support everyone else financially and emotionally to such extend that I almost lost myself in the process. Luckily for the both of us, we have grown so much stronger over the years, and honesty in our relationship is Key. So when we had the chat P mentioned that he really feels left out, he feels as if he is being punished for something that he has done (and here I always felt that I was the only one feeling this way). He also desperately wants a little bundle of joy, and for some reason we just always had to take the backseat, but not this year. P decided that we want to go see our GP, and he needs to go through an annual check (he feels he needs this), after this we decided that we would ask the GP to refer us to another fertility specialist. Don’t you get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the clinic we gone to last year. We just decided that we want to make a new start. A start where for once we will be able to focus on ourselves and what we want and need in our life, and yes I know life would be tough with this decision, we made it and we’ll stick to it. So wish me luck! And I will certainly keep you posted…