What a wait

Sjoe, this waiting this is just not for me… I just feel so out of touch. And so I picked up the phone tried to phone the PI again, and the phone keeps on being engaged… engaged… engaged… can it really be such a mission to get hold of someone. I wonder if people really understand what it does to a person who is really searching for those very special people in their lives, to wait, wait for all the answers to a maze or one hell of a riddle… Sometimes when I sit back and think about the day when we could actually meet, my tummy turns. I know that that day will be the greatest day in my life; however, will it be in theirs. I don’t even know whether they know that they have been adopted, and what that will do to their adoptive families. I am so desperately looking, that I will forget what this could do to a family, but I would not be able to let it go. How does one let go of the only family that you might still have, how do you let go of the fact that you have brothers and a sister, how do you forget about blood family and just turn away. I’m just not in the position to let go yet. Anyway…the phone stopped being engaged, my heart skipped a beat and I really sommer feel ill… and now, I’m stuck on a message system and have to wait my turn… hold… hold… hold… and eventually there I go through. Well there is currently an application to the minister to reveal particular information, should they accept the application I would be in a position to obtain more information regarding my sibling… And there the sock of my life… This will take approximately 5 MONTHS to get the answer back. Don’t you just hate process? When a process is suppose to work it doesn’t, and when you don’t want it to work, it works so well that there is just no other alternative… so I hate the process, the wait, and the fact that I normally get my way quick and now have to wait is just so FRUSTRATING… Anyway, I thought I’ll share my frustration today! I STILL HATE PROCESS